OK, I'm really, really sorry about this, because it will probably offend some people, but I couldn't resist it. I'll change some names to preserve anonymity, but otherwise this is all completely accurate.
Looking for possible job openings yesterday, I found this:
'Christian Faculty Jobs: Music Theory / Composition Professor, Oakville University. A full-time, tenure-track position teaching Music Theory / Composition on the undergraduate level. Secondary areas of teaching may include, but are not limited to: music technology, music education and/or additional areas based on the candidates [sic] strengths and the needs of the department...
'Oakville University is a comprehensive, primarily undergraduate, Baptist university of arts, sciences, and professional programs with an enrollment of over 3,000. It combines a evangelical, non-charismatic, theological position [sic]. Faculty, who must be born-again Christians, must agree with our doctrinal statement, and Community Covenant and General Work Place Standards. In addition to teaching excellence, expectations include Biblical integration of faith/learning, student advising, scholarly pursuits, service activities, collegiality, and church involvement.
'Please direct inquiries to Dr. Simon Walters, Dean, School of Humanities, or his assistant, Ms. Sue Nutter at 123-456-7890 or nutters@oakville.edu. Applications accepted until position is filled.'
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Churches (2)
Well, after previous comments I'm delighted to be able to write a positive post on this subject. Yesterday I walked up to a nearby church to talk about occasionally deputising there as an organist.
What impressed me most forcibly was the sheer size and scale of the building, and the whole operation which is run from it. I had seen the church before from outside, but it was only when I went in that I realised quite how extensive the complex is. In fact in many respects it wasn't like going into a church; it was like visiting a swanky set of corporate offices. This is simply a local church, but in the UK you would only come across something like this at a cathedral, or maybe one of the big evangelical churches in London, or the national headquarters of a certain denomination.
When I arrived, I went into a reception area which had two or three desks with official-looking people tapping away on PCs. There was a door through which I could see a corridor leading away to more offices. When the music director met me, she took me into the main church part, which was absolutely enormous, and very beautiful. The organ was built in 1987, three manuals, 40 ranks, perfect condition, beautiful to play. On the other side of the church was a wide 'piazza' space which had originally been outside but was now covered over. Later she showed me the 'educational suite' - a long corridor leading off to several more rooms. There were many more offices, a sizeable choir room ... it went on and on. It is a modern building, I wouldn't say more than 30 years old (just over 20 if built at the same time as the organ), well-designed, light, airy and in impeccable condition.
As an operation, it clearly employs a sizeable staff. This was a Monday lunchtime, but there were a number of people buzzing around, including a friendly young lady, dressed rather like a business executive, who was introduced as 'an associate minister' (how many do they have?). Everyone I met was very nice, welcoming and friendly. The music director is full-time; she runs two adult choirs, three junior choirs, and a handbell group, and co-ordinates all the music which takes place in the church; she told me she frequently struggles to get everything done in the time available. She is the organist; they also employ a choir director.
There are two services each Sunday morning; each attracts around 300 people. The really extraordinary thing about this is I happen to know there is another church of the same denomination one block away, which looks to be about the same size as this one. I would be surprised if there were 300 houses between the two churches. Yet there are also, of course, several churches of other denominations too. And we are not even talking about one of the more charismatic, evangelical, populist churches - this is, as far as I can tell, quite a mainstream and liberal denomination.
Looking round this building and meeting the people who work there, I began to understand more about why churches are so important here. If, when you think of 'church', you think of a large, modern, light, airy, spacious, well-equipped and well-resourced building, full of nice, friendly people, buzzing with activity throughout the week, which not only holds services but also has thriving music, educational and community outreach programmes, I suppose it doesn't seem so unappealing as the drafty, underfunded, under-resourced Victorian edifices you often find in the UK. If 'church' is something which is a regular part of life, often the bedrock of one's entire social life, for almost everyone in a community, rather than attracting only a small combination of well-meaning do-gooders, religious zealots and Jesus-anoraks as is so often the case in the UK, it perhaps seems less strange to want to be a part of it.
What impressed me most forcibly was the sheer size and scale of the building, and the whole operation which is run from it. I had seen the church before from outside, but it was only when I went in that I realised quite how extensive the complex is. In fact in many respects it wasn't like going into a church; it was like visiting a swanky set of corporate offices. This is simply a local church, but in the UK you would only come across something like this at a cathedral, or maybe one of the big evangelical churches in London, or the national headquarters of a certain denomination.
When I arrived, I went into a reception area which had two or three desks with official-looking people tapping away on PCs. There was a door through which I could see a corridor leading away to more offices. When the music director met me, she took me into the main church part, which was absolutely enormous, and very beautiful. The organ was built in 1987, three manuals, 40 ranks, perfect condition, beautiful to play. On the other side of the church was a wide 'piazza' space which had originally been outside but was now covered over. Later she showed me the 'educational suite' - a long corridor leading off to several more rooms. There were many more offices, a sizeable choir room ... it went on and on. It is a modern building, I wouldn't say more than 30 years old (just over 20 if built at the same time as the organ), well-designed, light, airy and in impeccable condition.
As an operation, it clearly employs a sizeable staff. This was a Monday lunchtime, but there were a number of people buzzing around, including a friendly young lady, dressed rather like a business executive, who was introduced as 'an associate minister' (how many do they have?). Everyone I met was very nice, welcoming and friendly. The music director is full-time; she runs two adult choirs, three junior choirs, and a handbell group, and co-ordinates all the music which takes place in the church; she told me she frequently struggles to get everything done in the time available. She is the organist; they also employ a choir director.
There are two services each Sunday morning; each attracts around 300 people. The really extraordinary thing about this is I happen to know there is another church of the same denomination one block away, which looks to be about the same size as this one. I would be surprised if there were 300 houses between the two churches. Yet there are also, of course, several churches of other denominations too. And we are not even talking about one of the more charismatic, evangelical, populist churches - this is, as far as I can tell, quite a mainstream and liberal denomination.
Looking round this building and meeting the people who work there, I began to understand more about why churches are so important here. If, when you think of 'church', you think of a large, modern, light, airy, spacious, well-equipped and well-resourced building, full of nice, friendly people, buzzing with activity throughout the week, which not only holds services but also has thriving music, educational and community outreach programmes, I suppose it doesn't seem so unappealing as the drafty, underfunded, under-resourced Victorian edifices you often find in the UK. If 'church' is something which is a regular part of life, often the bedrock of one's entire social life, for almost everyone in a community, rather than attracting only a small combination of well-meaning do-gooders, religious zealots and Jesus-anoraks as is so often the case in the UK, it perhaps seems less strange to want to be a part of it.
Friday, February 13, 2009
What is America? - or, Paytriotism (2)
Every so often, you read a book which profoundly alters your way of thinking. That's happened to me recently. The book in question is What is America? by Ronald Wright, which was given to me as a Christmas present by my father-in-law.
Those who like their politico-historical writing balanced and even-handed won't appreciate Mr Wright's book. But it is a pacy, colourful, and fascinating read. It's essentially a re-telling of the story of America, but it glosses over most of the well-known and often-told stories (Columbus, the Declaration of Independence, the Civil War, etc.) in order to explode some of the myths and, as he claims, lies about American history.
For example, he shows that the original European settlers (or 'invaders', as he calls them) arrived not in a virginal wilderness peopled by a few nomadic tribes, but in a sophisticated and civilized country, whose inhabitants had large towns, farms, and established political systems. He goes on to describe the Europeans' treatment of these societies - which included deliberate eradication by disease and ethnic displacement as well as more conventional warfare - as 'genocide'. Later, he expounds on America's imperial strategies in the 19th century, for example invading and occupying Hawaii and the Philippines for no real reason, and of course culminating in the tragic and ill-fated military adventures of recent years - Korea, Vietnam, Iraq. He also shows how the plundering of American wealth - particularly gold and minerals - helped to finance and make possible the Industrial Revolution in Britain.
Of course, there are always other ways of looking at things. I've no doubt many Native American tribes were as bloodthirsty in warfare as popular imagination suggests. And you can't judge morals and prerogatives of hundreds of years ago by the standards of today - for example, the Europeans obviously thought they had a divine imperative to 'civilize' the barbarians, and if they were triumphant in battle, that was the will of God. So I don't necessarily feel personally responsible for what my ancestors did. But at the end of the day - as Mr Wright says - we invaded their country, not the other way around.
Most importantly, what happened did eventually pave the way for the birth of a new country which had a profound effect on the Enlightenment, and set (until recently) global standards for freedom, equality and human dignity - even though the treatment of African-Americans, in particular, has always compromised those ideals.
Reading this book has certainly made me think again about how America got to be the way it is. It may be 'a great country', as I said in an earlier post, but I didn't quite realise before at what cost this was achieved.
Those who like their politico-historical writing balanced and even-handed won't appreciate Mr Wright's book. But it is a pacy, colourful, and fascinating read. It's essentially a re-telling of the story of America, but it glosses over most of the well-known and often-told stories (Columbus, the Declaration of Independence, the Civil War, etc.) in order to explode some of the myths and, as he claims, lies about American history.
For example, he shows that the original European settlers (or 'invaders', as he calls them) arrived not in a virginal wilderness peopled by a few nomadic tribes, but in a sophisticated and civilized country, whose inhabitants had large towns, farms, and established political systems. He goes on to describe the Europeans' treatment of these societies - which included deliberate eradication by disease and ethnic displacement as well as more conventional warfare - as 'genocide'. Later, he expounds on America's imperial strategies in the 19th century, for example invading and occupying Hawaii and the Philippines for no real reason, and of course culminating in the tragic and ill-fated military adventures of recent years - Korea, Vietnam, Iraq. He also shows how the plundering of American wealth - particularly gold and minerals - helped to finance and make possible the Industrial Revolution in Britain.
Of course, there are always other ways of looking at things. I've no doubt many Native American tribes were as bloodthirsty in warfare as popular imagination suggests. And you can't judge morals and prerogatives of hundreds of years ago by the standards of today - for example, the Europeans obviously thought they had a divine imperative to 'civilize' the barbarians, and if they were triumphant in battle, that was the will of God. So I don't necessarily feel personally responsible for what my ancestors did. But at the end of the day - as Mr Wright says - we invaded their country, not the other way around.
Most importantly, what happened did eventually pave the way for the birth of a new country which had a profound effect on the Enlightenment, and set (until recently) global standards for freedom, equality and human dignity - even though the treatment of African-Americans, in particular, has always compromised those ideals.
Reading this book has certainly made me think again about how America got to be the way it is. It may be 'a great country', as I said in an earlier post, but I didn't quite realise before at what cost this was achieved.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Yellow grass
This was the thing I liked least about Oklahoma City when I visited this time last year, in anticipation of my eventual move. All the grass was yellow. Apparently this is quite normal - it goes this colour in the winter, and becomes green again in the spring. I really don't like it.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
The grid system (3)
Building numbers on avenues do not go by block - they go by street number. So a building on the corner of 37th street will be numbered 3700 (or thereabouts).
Maybe, in fact, this is also the case for buildings on streets? - but it's hard to tell as the avenues in OKC have names rather than numbers.
I really will stop going on about this now.
Maybe, in fact, this is also the case for buildings on streets? - but it's hard to tell as the avenues in OKC have names rather than numbers.
I really will stop going on about this now.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Tornado
Well, it's finally happened - I've had my first tornado experience. As I was coming out of the supermarket earlier this afternoon, I noticed that the sky seemed very black, and as I was loading the groceries into the car, the sirens started wailing. I drove home and turned on the TV, just as the weather forecaster said that a funnel cloud was passing right across the nearest intersection to my house. I briefly thought about getting the dog and hiding in our coat closet (it's right in the centre of the house, furthest away from the windows and outside walls, which is where they tell you to go). But in a short while the danger had passed.
More bad weather systems have been forming to the south-west of OKC all afternoon, but they are generally not becoming tornados, and merely remaining as severe thunderstorms with high winds and 'baseball-sized hailstones'. So that's all right then.
I happened to phone our insurance agent a short while ago, and he said that the first funnel cloud had passed right by their office - they all watched it go by, sweeping up various bits of street furniture. It continued north-east to Edmond, a town just to the north of OKC, where it touched down and became a real tornado for about 10 minutes. The TV showed live pictures of it, a massive black twister, with huge bits of debris being thrown around. It went through residential areas and across a motorway. Funnily enough I was supposed to be driving to Edmond this afternoon to teach a piano lesson, but unsurprisingly that's been postponed.
It's only February. Tornado season starts around now and continues to November. I certainly hope we don't get too many more of these!
More bad weather systems have been forming to the south-west of OKC all afternoon, but they are generally not becoming tornados, and merely remaining as severe thunderstorms with high winds and 'baseball-sized hailstones'. So that's all right then.
I happened to phone our insurance agent a short while ago, and he said that the first funnel cloud had passed right by their office - they all watched it go by, sweeping up various bits of street furniture. It continued north-east to Edmond, a town just to the north of OKC, where it touched down and became a real tornado for about 10 minutes. The TV showed live pictures of it, a massive black twister, with huge bits of debris being thrown around. It went through residential areas and across a motorway. Funnily enough I was supposed to be driving to Edmond this afternoon to teach a piano lesson, but unsurprisingly that's been postponed.
It's only February. Tornado season starts around now and continues to November. I certainly hope we don't get too many more of these!
Monday, February 9, 2009
Work (3)
Before I moved to Oklahoma, a friend from the UK, who had spent a few months working here in the past, told me: 'Oklahomans work very long hours, but they get almost nothing done.'
It's true. The working day typically starts at 8am (even 7am is not uncommon), and often continues to 6pm or later. The salesman from whom we bought our car told us that he sometimes works 90 hours a week - of course he may have been exaggerating, but I think it's quite likely, as car dealerships are usually open to about 9pm Monday -Saturday, and he ususally seemed to be there when we phoned. I suppose he has an incentive to work such long hours as he's paid largely by commission. That's probably one reason why salespeople here are so attentive and friendly - though Oklahomans are naturally friendly anyway, and the service culture is definitely better here than in the UK.
Most people here work full-time, including many people (well) over 65. It's usual for both parents of a young family to work full-time: hence the wasp-striped school buses, ferrying children to and from school in their parents' absence. Part-time jobs usually consist of evening and weekend work, as it's assumed that anyone applying for a part-time job will be looking to fit it around their full-time one.
Add on church (typically two or three times a week, Sundays and Wednesday evenings) and the assumed heavy commitment to one's family, and your time is pretty much fully taken up. I think this is one reason why middle America is the home of the drive-through (fast food outlets, banks, pharmacies) - people simply don't have time to visit these establishments in what I would regard as a more conventional manner.
Other aspects of employment law and conditions don't help. Paid holiday and sick leave are paltry by UK standards, and even a routine visit to the doctor or dentist has to be taken as sick leave. If you're ill for more than about 10 days in a year, you have to take unpaid sick leave; and in a country where there's no universal health coverage (ie. your chances of getting better quickly might be lower than if that was not the case), that's not helpful.
Apparently, Oklahoma is what's called an 'at will state', which means employers can pretty much do what they like. For example, I am aware of a university which is requiring its staff to work 7.30am - 6pm for four days a week, for three months in the summer, in order to save on air conditioning bills. Not only are they allowed to do this (in the UK it would almost certainly be illegal, and if tried, the unions would refuse to comply) but, even more incredibly to me, most of the employees affected seem to think it's a good idea.
All these rules (hours, sick leave, etc.) are quite strictly enforced. The one card the employee does have up his or her sleeve is that very often, no notice period is required - you can just decide not to turn up for work one day. Hence, I suppose, the occasional dramatic scenes you see in American films where the employee announces 'I quit!', packs up his things, and strides out of the door. I think of Lester Burnham leaving his boring job on a magazine in American Beauty, or George W. Bush giving up work on the oil patch (as I believe it's called) in W. Not quite as dramatic as the British version, which would be 'Right! I'm giving you my contractual month's notice, which I will work in full as I need a good reference from you!'
At the same time, Oklahoma is enough of a hillbilly state to have a rather laid-back attitude to life. There's never any rush to get anything done or to get anywhere, and things can usually wait; so even though everyone spends a lot of time at work, they're not necessarily being very efficient or productive when they're there. It's rather like someone who keeps their house obsessively tidy, but then you discover stuff is crammed any-old-how into drawers and cupboards. I suppose it's a mixture of the Puritan work ethic and the slow, Southern way of life.
It's true. The working day typically starts at 8am (even 7am is not uncommon), and often continues to 6pm or later. The salesman from whom we bought our car told us that he sometimes works 90 hours a week - of course he may have been exaggerating, but I think it's quite likely, as car dealerships are usually open to about 9pm Monday -Saturday, and he ususally seemed to be there when we phoned. I suppose he has an incentive to work such long hours as he's paid largely by commission. That's probably one reason why salespeople here are so attentive and friendly - though Oklahomans are naturally friendly anyway, and the service culture is definitely better here than in the UK.
Most people here work full-time, including many people (well) over 65. It's usual for both parents of a young family to work full-time: hence the wasp-striped school buses, ferrying children to and from school in their parents' absence. Part-time jobs usually consist of evening and weekend work, as it's assumed that anyone applying for a part-time job will be looking to fit it around their full-time one.
Add on church (typically two or three times a week, Sundays and Wednesday evenings) and the assumed heavy commitment to one's family, and your time is pretty much fully taken up. I think this is one reason why middle America is the home of the drive-through (fast food outlets, banks, pharmacies) - people simply don't have time to visit these establishments in what I would regard as a more conventional manner.
Other aspects of employment law and conditions don't help. Paid holiday and sick leave are paltry by UK standards, and even a routine visit to the doctor or dentist has to be taken as sick leave. If you're ill for more than about 10 days in a year, you have to take unpaid sick leave; and in a country where there's no universal health coverage (ie. your chances of getting better quickly might be lower than if that was not the case), that's not helpful.
Apparently, Oklahoma is what's called an 'at will state', which means employers can pretty much do what they like. For example, I am aware of a university which is requiring its staff to work 7.30am - 6pm for four days a week, for three months in the summer, in order to save on air conditioning bills. Not only are they allowed to do this (in the UK it would almost certainly be illegal, and if tried, the unions would refuse to comply) but, even more incredibly to me, most of the employees affected seem to think it's a good idea.
All these rules (hours, sick leave, etc.) are quite strictly enforced. The one card the employee does have up his or her sleeve is that very often, no notice period is required - you can just decide not to turn up for work one day. Hence, I suppose, the occasional dramatic scenes you see in American films where the employee announces 'I quit!', packs up his things, and strides out of the door. I think of Lester Burnham leaving his boring job on a magazine in American Beauty, or George W. Bush giving up work on the oil patch (as I believe it's called) in W. Not quite as dramatic as the British version, which would be 'Right! I'm giving you my contractual month's notice, which I will work in full as I need a good reference from you!'
At the same time, Oklahoma is enough of a hillbilly state to have a rather laid-back attitude to life. There's never any rush to get anything done or to get anywhere, and things can usually wait; so even though everyone spends a lot of time at work, they're not necessarily being very efficient or productive when they're there. It's rather like someone who keeps their house obsessively tidy, but then you discover stuff is crammed any-old-how into drawers and cupboards. I suppose it's a mixture of the Puritan work ethic and the slow, Southern way of life.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Vocabulary (2)
I really thought by now I must have discovered all the differences between British English and American English, but I've just discovered a new one. Americans do not use the construction 'double' (or 'triple') when reading out a number or spelling a name (eg. 'double zero' or 'double m'). They always say each digit or letter individually: 'zero zero', 'm m'. I've often wondered why I've had such trouble spelling the name of our road, which has two consecutive letter r's, over the phone. Now I know.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
The grid system (2)
Regular readers of my blog - and I know there are some, so hello to you - may be interested to know that I've updated the post called 'The grid system' (19 Jan - now retitled 'The grid system (1)') as I had a few more observations and thoughts to make. Sorry, but I find this subject completely fascinating, even though I'm sure many of you don't!
Work (2)
A milestone was passed yesterday - I taught a piano lesson. This is the first official work I've done and been paid for in the USA (as opposed to all the other work, which is being paid for from the UK).
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